The Lion's Den

 Bedtime in our house is still leaving me feeling something like what I imagine a lion tamer feels before he steps into the ring. I am slightly nervous, the adrenaline is pumping and I am hoping for the best before we even get done brushing teeth. Little E. Oh that stinker of a child whom I love so dearly. She is the most persistent human being that has ever walked upon this earth. I am more than certain of that. I keep telling myself someday this persistence will pay off for her.  I try desperately to beat that thought into my mind rather than beating my head against the wall.

She will get of out bed time after time after time. She's relentless. "I want some socks on." "I'm thirsty." "I need to potty." "I need to potty again." and the ever famous, "I want you." --- "I want you." Both of my children have used this line to my utter detriment. I can be sitting within seven inches of them and they will start whining. When I say, "What's the matter?' They say, "I want you." When I go into the other room, "I want you." When they are hanging all over me when I'm trying to fold laundry, "I want you." What does that even mean?! I could understand it if I were ever gone away from them. But I'm not!! I am with them all the time. They can literally be sitting on top of my head and say it, "I want you." Ugh. So anyway, this bedtime struggle with Little E. It is killing me. I will likely be entering an asylum soon if things don't turn around. I don't know what to do.  The hardest part is the screaming.  I can deal with the screaming.  I would let her cry it out if she would just stay in her room and do it very quietly.  But she doesn't.  She wails at the top of her lungs and walks around the house until she can find a person to direct it at.  The problem with this is that Miss A is also trying to sleep at this time.  She needs to sleep because she has to get up and go to school the next day.  So the quandary I'm in is trying to figure out how to do this all peacefully so Miss A can get some shut-eye.

I feel that I'm walking a fine line ON TOP of egg shells at this point.  The fine line is between being nurturing and being firm.  Being assertive without being downright scary  - because that's the last thing I need, to give her another excuse why she can't go to bed.  "I'm scared Mommy....of you."  I have figured out at least this much - she responds better when I'm being nice.  (Duh.)  She cries louder and harder when someone raises their voice.  (Duh.)  But I think it has a lot to do with the same adrenaline I have pumping through my veins.  When she gets "threatened" so to speak - she reaches all new levels of upset.  If I'm not firm enough, she will likely get out of bed more than 17 times in one night.  So lately I've been addressing her "needs" quickly and quietly and putting her back in bed.   Sometimes it works like a dream, sometimes it's an utter nightmare.  On the upside, on nights when she is completely super worn out, she goes down much easier.  So basically I've been trying to wear her out all day every day.  To be honest I think I'm the one who ends up worn out and she ends up being a disaster by the end of the day because she's been going nonstop without a nap.  Shit.

I've heard of people putting locks on the outside of their children's doors.  So (don't forward this to the fire marshall) I tried my own version of wrapping a ribbon (hot pink, no less) around the doorknob of her room and the doorknob of the linen closet right outside of her room so she can't pull her door open.  This resulted in her screaming at the door, "TAKE THAT PINK THING OFF!  I NO LIKE THAT PINK THING!  TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF! TAKE IT OFF"  and that goes ON and ON until the dogs in the neighborhood are howling.  So let's just say she might be claustrophic and I might be charged with some kind of offense.  In my defense, to open the door, all you have to do is open the linen closet door too.  And it didn't work so I'm not longer practicing this form of torture.  Please don't send me any hate mail.

I've tried rewards, I've tried punishments, I've tried eliminating naps.  I've tried everything when it comes to bedtime - just like I've tried everything when it comes to getting through to her in all other aspects.  She is just not easily persuaded to do anything she doesn't want to do.  I have to tell you - I'm not at all concerned with peer pressure in her future.  I know for certain she will never do anything she doesn't want to.  She reminds me of this every day.

So meanwhile, I will channel my inner Seigfried and/or Roy - and or perhaps even my Steve Irwin (may he RIP) because in these moments I feel a lot more like a lion (tiger?) tamer/ alligator wrestler than a suburban super mom.

Got a hot bedtime tip?  (Um, not that kind.)  I mean, like a suggestion or scientifically proven method or fact or ANYTHING that will help me with this?  SPILL IT!